Steve 'Flash' JuonAt 14 years old, a time in my life when most decisions were not mine to be made, one I could and DID control was what music I listened to. I had a record player, a low tier knockoff Walkman, and a pretty decent boombox. I also had a learner’s permit that only allowed me to drive to and from school, and I scraped together some money to put a tape deck and a pair of speakers in my jalopy of a car. Every morning I’d pick a tape out of my collection, pop the tape in my car, and when I got to school I’d pop the tape out so it didn’t melt in the heat. My musical choices were limited by the fact I could only drive so far, so until I discovered the joy of ordering by mail from Upstairs Records, I had a lot of tapes purchased at Target or Walmart when accompanied by my parents. Ugh.
“Coming Back Hard Again” by the Fat Boys was one of those take-it-or-leave-it propositions. Those aforementioned retailers were reluctant to carry rap albums in the 1980’s, and if it had a sticker or warning of any kind about explicit content, forget about it. Now lest I be misunderstood this isn’t a knock against Prince Markie Dee (RIP), Kool Rock-Ski or Buffy the Human Beat Box (RIP). I was fond of the Fat Boys growing up and my affection for their records now includes the rose-tinted glasses of nostalgia. If you want a tape from Public Enemy, EPMD or N.W.A and wind up buying the Fat Boys instead because it’s the only album the store will carry, it feels like you’re settling for second best. The more rap releases I could own the better, but this wasn’t my preferred choice.
One of the ways I would supplement my collection at that age was tape trading. While you had someone else’s tape you’d dub off a copy to listen to. Do you think a bunch of teenagers with limited income were worried about some far-off boogeyman enforcing copyright restrictions? Hell no. The problem is that “Coming Back Hard Again” was not good trading material. Even the few friends I had who were rap fans had lost interest in the Fat Boys compared to the harder rap acts prevalent in ’88. They weren’t doing themselves any favors by becoming known as “the fat rappers who did cover songs” thanks to the success of “Wipe Out” the year prior. Don’t blame me — that’s what people said. With songs on this album like “The Twist” and “Louie, Louie” they weren’t debunking that reputation.
This album quickly got shuffled to the back of my collection. I played tapes like Michael Jackson’s “Thriller” and Public Enemy’s “Fight the Power” so much that as Biggie would say “the tape popped” (though I had no Private Stock to sip on). From these experiences I learned to make backup copies of my own albums and not just dubs of other people’s albums. “Coming Back Hard Again” never needed a backup. “Are You Ready For Freddy” wasn’t even the best Nightmare on Elm Street rap song of the 1980’s. If there were four it was #4. If there were ten is was #10. It’s literally the last on the list no matter how long that list is.
Even as a child I smelled the stink of desperation all over this album. The Fat Boys were trying to cash in on each and every thing that was trending in pop culture. With hindsight I can be more forgiving and say that the record label was pushing them to do it, but where “Wipe Out” had propelled “Crushin’” to platinum status, nothing on their fifth album had the same appeal. Lame knockoffs of LL Cool J’s “I Need Love” like “All Day Lover” certainly weren’t going to get them there. The word CRINGE didn’t exist in our vocabulary back then but there’s nothing seductive or sexy about this song. It’s silly at best.
Even the cover of “Coming Back Hard Again” feels like a misguided attempt to be impressive. Leather jackets and motorcycles were definitely cool at the time, but looking at this makes me think some misguided publicist tried to combine Kurtis Blow and Run-D.M.C. for a Fat Boys photo shoot. It doesn’t fit them at all. I swear that’s not a size joke but I apologize if it reads that way in print. Is there any way to save this album? Well songs like “Powerlord” help. Instead of trying to either do what was trending or hip or forced on them by a record executive, they just rap like the Fat Boys of old, complete with a classic beatbox performance by Buffy between verses that also draws the song to a close.
The album needed more of this and less of songs like “Jelly Roll” and “Pig Feet.” Neither of those are the worst songs here, but they just showcase how the Fat Boys had been pigeonholed by their own gimmick of food-based raps. Sounds like “Rock the House Y’all” and the Jamaican influenced “Big Daddy” stand the test of time and deserve to be heard in the present day. Honestly I can even stomach novelty raps like “The Twist,” as corny as it is, just because I can still remember what is was like to be 14 and have limited choices on how to spend whatever money I earned from summer jobs. I don’t think “Coming Back Hard Again” is a musical travesty or a pure tragedy, but I’d recommend every Fat Boys album that came out before it over this one. Make a tier list and it’s going to be close to the bottom.