To all you southern belles out there: if you think it’s easy being the Queen of Crunk, think again. Rasheeda, the gorgeous ‘Georgia Peach’ with the venomous after bite, has worn the title for many years, and is rejuvenating her claim to the throne with her latest installment “Dat Type of Gurl.” Here is a guideline for all you wannabe types thinking of taking it from her.
#1 Work hard.
Do you have some talent and managed to land a big distribution deal, sassy? Don’t think it’s going to be a breeze from now on. The present Queen of Crunk learned that the hard way. The Atlanta native dropped her debut with the Detroit soul label Motown, and they, in turn, dropped her relentlessly after disappointing results. Rasheeda didn’t give up. When her next album “A Ghetto Dream” was buried by most critics, she turned towards her loyal southern fan base. Even when she gave birth and had to juggle a career and the education of her baby boy after, she didn’t let up. “Dat Type of Gurl” is her fourth album in stores.
#2 Be nasty as can be.
If you’re thinking about holding back in this crunk game: don’t. If you have a killer body like the Queen’s, make ballers drool all over the slippery dance floor when you make your moves. Let ’em holler while you “Touch Ya Toes.” Once you got them under your spell, make sure to keep them there. Tease them, lure them. If you get one of your preys in the bedroom, introduce them to the “Georgia Peach”:
“You on the run, got a federal case
I know a place you can bury your face
Yum, yum, gonna get you a taste
Gotta shake: let it go like Mase
Watch your tongue: gotta know how to act
From the front, all the way to the back
It’s therapeutic and it helps me relax
I’ve got dem goodies, boy, get you a snack”
#3 Don’t be too original.
Once you established yourself, leave experimenting to the feeble competition. Use beats which work well on the dance floor or in your ride. Heavy on the synth, heavy on the bass. Make them remember like it still is back in the days. Don’t confuse the listeners with exotic lines. Know your fans, like on the more aggressive Pastor Troy supported club anthem “Poppin Bottles”:
“Headed to the bar, brawls rollin nice
Cuz’ I’m looking cute, so I ain’t surprised
Yeah it’s Rasheeda: I’m looking like a model
Y’all having drinks, but we poppin bottles”
#4 Keep your friends close.
Reign supreme, but keep close ties with the southern aristocracy. Rasheeda worked with Nelly, Petey Pablo, and not to mention the aforementioned King of Crunk Lil’Jon on earlier albums. “Dat Type of Gurl” features a surprising amount of female singers and MC’s, but also old friends like Akon, Fabo of d4l, and the earlier mentioned madman Pastor Troy. And of course her D-Lo crew, who never let her down, are well-represented.
#5 Restyle image.
“A Ghetto Dream” showed a female MC who was just as mean as any other down south brawler. “Dat Type of Gurl” shows a temptress Queenpin, who knows what she wants and how many times a night she wants it. The “My Bubble Gum” video of her new album displays a cheerfully smiling local block knockout, who tells you in tiny jean skirts she is ‘the type of girl to take to yo momma house.’ The very end of the video shows a hooded Queen of Crunk surrounded by her D-Lo goons, but it is only to reassure that the peachy skin still contains the familiar thugstress. Her new bubble gum wrapper could get her some new fans outside of Atlanta.
If you want to have a shot at the crown, read these rules well. Because no matter how hard they work, queens do age. Queens have predecessors. Queens need heirs. But beware. Outside of the region, she won’t attract a large following. But in the south, people love their queen. If you fail? Better run. This peach will bite your head off, if you’re not careful.